Life has really kicked me in the butt... It's been a long time since I last wrote or even opened up my blogger account and I feel terrible about it. It's one of those things I knew I couldn't give 100% so I just avoided it. I'm an avoider. I get this seasonal depression every year around the end of summer. It seems opposites of what it should be. I'm not sure if it's the blazing sun that burns the life out of me every year or I'm on an emotional cycle that just happens to occur during this time?
We've been in the process of buying our first home the past 6 months. It was a bumpy depressing road of "I could see our family here"... to "you were out bid by a cash offer". crash and burns like this happened frequently. Good news is, we shall be in a place to call our own in about a month!
I have lost all motivation for school, even though I'm barely getting through my classes... Okay, a B- is not barely getting through but I know that's not my best and that's a disappointment! It's a disappointment because even though I am hating school right now (along with working full time) for some reason I think... "what if I want to get my Master's? Is this academic progress going to be substantial?" ....as if I would ever have the time to complete that once I'm done!
Or maybe it's the fact that I spend most of my day in lala land and my imagination that is finally crashing into the reality of life?
It could be this yearning to have my own business and something that represents Me. I'm ready to move on creatively but logically, I just cant. We have a plan, and that plan is dependent upon this one thing that I cant change.... at least for right now... so I'm stuck, in this haze, ready and waiting to move on.
Summer is over and the brisk of fall has arrived so I should be out of this funk in time for my 30th next week! Happy Fall!
